Guldasta

A bouquet of flowers picked along the way ….

A dialogue between husband and wife, Part 4 October 5, 2007

This is the 4th and concluding part of the dialogue. For part 1 go here, part 2 go here and part 3 go here.

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“Ladoo! which world are you in?” asked a bemused Sanjeev, his face like a child who has caught his mother eating cookies on the sly.
“I saw you staring at our wedding picture with a look that was rather funny”, he said in a jovial tone.

“Sorry love, I had drifted away. Thank God!”, said Nandita

“Thank God what?” he said sounding very curious.

“Nothing, just a bad day-dream. Let me hurry and set our breakfast. I am famished”, said Nandita, rising from the sofa.

“Hello? it’s Sunday. Remember, my day of setting the breakfast?? You seem really lost. Are you OK?”, said Sanjeev, now sounding doubtful and a little worried.

Nandita smiled and sank back into the yellow-blue pillow covers on the sofa.

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18 Responses to “A dialogue between husband and wife, Part 4”

  1. Maryam Says:

    What a twist ………….. 🙂

    Good work

  2. gurdas Says:

    Maryam,

    Th end was more out of need than design. Initially I had imagined a reversal of things gone wrong between Sanjeev and Nandita. I wanted them to travel back and restart afresh – with love. But it was getting a little too drawn and since the message was (hopefully) already conveyed I used the old dirty trick. Personally, I dislike books and movies which build a scene only to end it as a dream. Thats cheap! So, while I am glad that some of my readers have liked this end, as a writer it is shallow work. Really.

  3. Anil Singla Says:

    Hi Gurdas

    I read it in one breath only to find an excitingend. Graet Sir. What amazed me, was your knowledge of relationships, it was really detailed. Even a married man can not put it on paper. This dialogue really helps to put one’s own married relationship under scanner.

  4. gurdas Says:

    Hi Anil,

    Thanks for stopping by. I find observation to be a great way to learn. People talk all the time and not necessarily through words. The whole body talks. What an amazing dialogue it is out there.

  5. Monty Says:

    HI,
    Great twist and great conversation..i was really very much dwellved into the situation u have narrated, but i must say, the end may be more interesting….anyways soon i will be labelled as a married man and i wish this conversation will not happen in my entire life ever.

  6. Shweta Purohit Says:

    Hi Gurdas,

    First of all i must congratulate you for writing this fantastic article..Specially the way you have portrayed Nandita’s thoughts and dialogues..I was wondering if this could be a man’s imagination, so close to my own thoughts..i dont think men have that thought line..But to end my curiosity and to confirm let me ask you this ques.. Did you take Nandita’s thoughts from any other novel/article/movie etc??If not then i must say that you can understand your partner very well..
    Looking fwd to read more on your blog…:)

  7. gurdas Says:

    Hello Shweta,

    Thanks for stopping by and your kind appreciation. To quickly answer your curiosity – no, neither Nandita’s thoughts nor any other part of the piece is taken from another novel, article or movie. I can confidently credit the piece to myself. Having said that, I must also say that it is not purely born of my imagination. Much of it is observation of couples (young and old) that I come across. Nandita and Sanjeev are each an amalgamation of real people (I have met) and fiction.

    “i dont think men have that thought line” – ouch! that hurts 🙂
    I would say that women are generally more sensitive than men when it comes to everyday human emotions.

    “you can understand your partner very well.” Thanks. I hope that holds true whenever I have a partner. As of now, I am but an observer of other couples.

  8. Neha Says:

    Really good insight/observations on relationships and thoughts… but I agree with u the forced ending looked shallow…
    BTW, U’ll do urself a great favour by getting a partner!! :)…. U’ll soon find urself climbing down the other side of the hill…
    Cheers,
    Neha (Saxena)

  9. gurdas Says:

    Neha,

    Thanks for your encouragement and candid feedback.
    Getting myself a partner might be a favour to myself but then I feel pity for the other person and stop short of taking the plunge 🙂
    As for the hill, God whispered in my ear that the fruits on that side are more ripe.
    ps: you aren’t exactly young yourself you old witch.

  10. lori78 Says:

    Hi gurdas,

    Excellent piece despite the ending! The dialogue between the two characters has really drawn me. Gosh, i’m becoming addicted to your blog (Lol). It’s good reading!

  11. gurdas Says:

    lori78,

    I am flattered! Yes, that ending could have been better. Maybe when I get paid a million dollars to write a book, I will be more honest with my story telling 🙂
    Your addiction is my encouragement. Not that I write regularly. But whenever I do, it is good to know someone out there will be reading it.

  12. Gagan Says:

    hmmn.. since I stopped at your blog, I read this. You have intresting Blog.. I must say..
    About this story, I liked the detailed and hair raisingly alive narration, really very nice.. u got the skill of a good writer Gurdas..
    But… I felt something missing..
    I think, it is unusually usual now.. from ages now.. to see the blame being shifted slighly and with a soft touch on the husband.. that he went on with earning money and treating his wife as a thing rather than a human.. and the poor girl always gains sympathy by acting lost and reflecting on old times.. I need to hear a story now.. which reflects on the other side.. I hope u will write some day…
    The frustration, distance and ignorance between relationships does not build by itself by time .. There is(are) always a reason(s) behind it.. I wished your story had some of these reasons in it, and perhaps show where the ignorance crept in from both sides.. not necessarily the solution/rectification parts.. as they might get preachy.. but an extension/background to the story.. you know.. the reasons of the ignorance.. if you know what I mean.. as otherwise I feel.. it is a good dialouge.. a good writing skill.. a message which could have a been a good social message left unconveyed..
    Please don’t feel, I am being judgmental or over analytical.. I said this, as I see a good writer in you.. so thought may be this observation might help u.. but as I always say to people about my thoughts, “please feel free to ignore them” 🙂

  13. gurdas Says:

    Gagan: Your comment raises many valid points and I will try answer them all. This post was part imagination, part observation. I have known a few couples that fit this bill, and specifically one in which both man and woman are my long time friends. The last time I heard from them, they were doing far better than this post. Thank God!
    You are right that the blame (in such cases) is quickly thrown on the man. And sometimes that is just unfair. But my story is just one of the many possible stories. I am not saying this is the only truth out there. I have seen a few couples where the man is trying very hard, but the woman is refusing to change or adapt. I promise to write that story too.
    In a perfect world, perfect truth will prevail. Each person will take cognizance of his/her errors and make remedies.

    Having said all that, my big learning from my observations is that relationships fail because communication fails. People just do not talk. You see it everywhere – at work and at home. But it hurts most when it happens in a marriage. Because that is the most sacrosanct relationship we choose, and also the most beautiful. That it should fail because two people decided to remain holed up is a pity. In fact, almost a sin.

    • Gagan Says:

      Hi Gurdas –

      Thanks for your reply. I really appreciate your promise to write the story on the other side of the coin. I will be looking forward to it, and whenever you do, please let me know.

      That being said, I will just add more to the reasons of the married relationships falling apart.. Communication is definetly one of them. But I think.. it does not fall apart again by iteslf.. Yet there are other problems, ego – the notion that “I” cannot be wrong, being un-comprising, un-adjusting and denial for changing yourself or even not realizing that there is something wrong with me, in search for a “perfect” partner – and not realizing that if you are ready to change a bit – to accept a bit – the relation can become harmonious, your family is your family but my family is ours, regional typecast – the notion that the people on the the other side of world or even the other side of nation are crooked/dumb/selfish etc., religious typecasting – like all Muslims are alike, and may be many more….
      Well, a lot said 🙂 Anyways Gurdas..
      Do keep up the good work.. Keep writing and keep sharing your stories..
      All the very best to you and God Bless.

      Gagan

  14. gurdas Says:

    Gagan: Well said. Yes, all those and a few more are the reasons marriages fail. And failure does not necessarily mean divorce. If I have to pick one word, I would say the exit of togetherness marks failure.
    But what saddens me most are those failed marriages where neither party had a marked flaw. Both desire a fulfilling life with their partners, and yet end up distanced. Those are the ones that have communication failure as the BIG reason. And those are the ones which could have been saved by just talking and sharing.

    • Gagan Says:

      It is heart-warming to know that you feel the sadness of those couples.. esp. considering the fact that you yourself are not married yet! I think thats one of the vitues of a good writer.. to “feel” without experiencing..

  15. Rankin Says:

    hi there, I can’t find your contact information but your web design was off on firefox and opera. Anyways, i just suscribd to your rss.

  16. gurdas Says:

    Rankin, thanks for letting me know. I will load the page in Firefox and Opera and report the issue to wordpress team.


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