A bouquet of flowers picked along the way ….

Giving and Receiving October 2, 2007

“Why do you have to be so formal?”, she said in the manner of a comment.

For a second my thoughts were frozen as I had not imagined my gesture as “formal”. I somehow found that comment-question to be out of place, a little dry and bordering on the impolite. My mind whirled and quickly consulted whatever little I knew of her disposition and sensitivities and it was only then that I made some meaning out of the comment. So, I answered explaining the informality of the gesture. And all it took was an ordinary birthday gift, given out of sheer love and respect for her interests and associations!

Later, in the comforting solitude of aloneness, I pondered over the incident and its origins. Here I was expressing my joy through a socially accepted gesture. I would prefer a bearhug anyday but then not many people can take a public hug. Especially so if you are a young beautiful lady! Alternate responses could have been: “Thanks, that’s very nice of you”, or “Thanks, that’s very thoughtful of you” or the all time classic delivered with a smile that goes upto your eyes – “Thanks!”.

For strange reasons, giving and receiving have become burdensome. People keep score, see ulterior motives where none exist and have built a whole universe of complexity around one of the most fundamental acts to Life. While one would expect a natural act to be easy, the truth is far from that. Few people can receive with grace, fewer still can give gracefully.

Giving and Receiving is as fundamental as breathing. You receive breath and you give breath. The giver exists because there is a receiver. Neither is above the other. Neither can survive as a singular entity.

Giving is Receiving.


2 Responses to “Giving and Receiving”

  1. gypsygirl Says:

    A well written post and so true! As a child I always thought people like receiving even if not giving… But over the years I’ve found, most people can’t even receive with grace and humility, let alone giving.. But true enough only those who can give themselves completely without the ifs n buts are the ones who truely appreciate when they receive…
    When you give,you receive a blissful peace with self that nothing else can provide.. 🙂

  2. gurdas Says:


    Thanks for stopping by.

    The notions of giving and receiving got all screwed up because of how mankind evolved. In many cultures, the giver is esteemed (that’s OK with me), but at the same time the receiver is looked down upon (ugghh!).

    The sage goes around town receiving alms. Is he any lower? One enables the other. Together they make a whole. By themselves they have no existence.

    May the gypsy in you always live.

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