Guldasta

A bouquet of flowers picked along the way ….

Saawaria (Movie Review) November 10, 2007

Filed under: Movie Reviews — gurdas @ :

I paid Rs. 140/- to watch Saawaria. I will gladly pay Rs. 1400/- to get a chance to shake Sanjay Leela Bhansali out of his delusionary slumber.

This movie deserves a puny 1 out of 5.

I cannot believe this comes from the same man who gave us Devdas and Black. Was SLB sleeping while someone else directed and edited the movie? Or has he lost his senses? This movie has NOTHING to make it watchable. A non-existent plot, lack lustre acting, and yes an unending assault on your senses of gaudy “beautiful” sets. Some idiot in the production team thought just showing us painted walls, silk clothes and designer jewellery will sell the film. And God, they never stop showing that!  The movie is completely shot within a set. Not a trace of reality here. A street with potholes has its walls gleaming as if they are painted with Asian paints Royale. There should have been a statutory warning that says “movie loaded with impossible fairy tale settings”.

The worst thing to happen to a love story is that the lead pair leaves you unconvinced they are in love. I was left searching for traces of love between Ranbir Kapoor and Sonam Kapoor. Only to find them cold, sparkless and even cheap at times.

Try this: Ranbir walks into a congregation of Muslims readying for their prayer. A solemn scene. He breaks into a dance and in a second all the devotees start dancing behind him (like they do in parks behind Govinda). I felt like puking.

And logical consistency takes a complete backseat. There are buildings that look like 17th century, trains that seem like early 20th century, clothes varying between 10th and 21st century, and language again from 10th to 21st century. What? Everything is decorated with flowers and geometric patterns, paintings and gold embroidery. After the first 2 minutes, you start feeling sick. After the first 10 minutes, if you were me, you will be swearing and generously using the f*** word.

And will someone please please please give Zohra Sehgal a fresh role? I loved it the first time she was shown as an old lady young at heart. I loved it the second time too. But when it happens the 10th time, you lose all interest in the character she plays. Because it is so damn predictable what she will say, or how she will act.

If you hate yourself, go watch Saawaria.

– – – –

Here’s another review of Saawaria by The GreatBong, in a style that is unmatched:

http://greatbong.net/2007/11/15/saawariya-the-review/

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7 Responses to “Saawaria (Movie Review)”

  1. ha ah Well said Gurdas. thank fully i just paid Rs 35. Anyways, it was more of a theatre or play rather than a movie. I could recall that Manjula Chatterjee used to direct such plays in our school time–i was instantly reminded of those plays. As far as SLB goes, guess he has now gone bonkers like shyam benegal Lolzz

  2. Anuj Says:

    You have no taste for Movies. Quit doing this and try your hands as something less professional…something like a sales assistant, where you can continue to enjoy passing your ‘personal’ judgment and opinion and on an odd occasion, an auntie might find it useful as well.
    Its for people like you that our movie industry is encouraged to produce pointless masala flicks.
    This is a movie which tells a simple movie…..beautifully. The canvas is absolutely amazing, and anybody who understands or appreciates any form of art, this movie is brilliant. Yes, it is set in a fairyland, and if you were not busy fetching popcorn, it was one of the first facts pointed out by the narrator.
    If you aspire to be a film critic, start by watching the whole movie, and possibly with some concentration.

    What a rubbish reviewer you are. Shame Shame.

  3. gurdas Says:

    Hello Anuj,

    Rubbed you the wrong side, did I?

    Let me try answer you:

    1) I have no taste for movies without substance, which is what Saawaria is (IMHO). Having said that, each of us has a right to his/her opinion to a movie. So, I respect the fact that you liked Saawaria. I did not.

    1) Whoever said a Sales Assistant is less professional probably never sold anything. Ask any business tycoon and they will tell you how vital Sales Assistants are. Or maybe read “Ziglar on Selling: The Ultimate Handbook for the Complete Sales Professional”. You will benefit. I have nothing but the highest regard for sales people. They are the lubrication in the business machinery of our world.

    2) Every honest review ever written is personal. Or do you like a reviewer who finds a movie disgusting but writes “I loved the movie” simply because he/she thought it was high art or directed by a big name?

    3) Our movie industry also produced “Bheja Fry”, “Life in a Metro”, “No Smoking” and “Blue Umbrella” in very recent times. I enjoyed each one of these.

    4) The canvass is nice. But stops being that after the first few minutes. I was there to see a movie, not a painting exhibition. My local art gallery serves better stuff, for free. A movie should also have memorable acting and punchy dialogues, both of which were glaringly absent in Saawaria.

    6) Simply because the narrator declares the movie is set in an imaginary world gives SLB the license to shove down my throat a badly imagined imaginary world? How about the narrator starting with “this is a stupidly simple movie without any acting”?

    7) Film critic? me? Thats a compliment. Thanks.

    What a passionate person you are. Great. Great.

  4. chandra Says:

    the picture is very romantic

  5. chandra Says:

    i am interested for to watch the picture Saawria.

  6. Crimson Feet Says:

    I have not seen the movie because my close friends gave it a thumbs down. But I don’t expect much from a man who is dishonest enough to copy an entire screenplay, without giving due credits, and then lobby for awards. Thats Mr Bhansali, the miracle worker, doing a Black for you.

    I enjoyed your response to the ‘passionate person’ above! 🙂

  7. gurdas Says:

    CF,

    Is Black a scene by scene lift of “The Miracle Worker”? Or is it just that the storyline is ‘broadly’ similar. While the latter can be excused, the former is surely sacrilege.


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